I Refuse to Pick a Lane: This is Dolo's Rhyme

On authenticity, weather patterns, and giving yourself permission to just live

So here's the thing about building a personal brand in 2025: everyone tells you to pick a niche. Choose your lane. Are you a fitness influencer? A motherhood blogger? A fashion entrepreneur? A wellness guru? Pick one and stay in it.

But I'm a 36-year-old woman (almost 37), and I am full of everything. Full of contradictions. Full of moods. Full of dreams and doubts and dance moves and deep thoughts. And just like many of us, I contain multitudes.

So I'm making a decision right now: I refuse to pick a lane.

The Autopilot Has Stopped

For too long, I've been on autopilot. Get up, do this, do that. Be the good mother. Be the supportive wife. Be a professional entrepreneur. Be the woman everyone expects me to be. Smile when I'm supposed to smile. Show up when I'm supposed to. Fit in. Belong. Perform.

But that stops now.

The acting stops. The fitting stops. The shrinking of myself to make others comfortable stops.

What starts now is self-belonging, self-knowing, self-love, and self-declaration.

The Ball of Sunshine Paradox

People have always told me, "Oh my God, you are a ball of sunshine." They say things like, "My day is better just because I spoke to you," or "You have so much energy!" And I'm standing there thinking, What are you talking about? I don't see that. I don't feel that.

Because here's the truth: I do have days when I feel like sunshine. But I also have depressive days. Days when I'm just surviving on three hours of sleep. Days when the darkness feels heavy. Days when suicidal thoughts creep in uninvited.

What you project to people is sometimes very different from what you feel inside. And people like me, we tend to just give, give, give to others. But we don't mirror what we give to ourselves.

So yes, I can be a ball of sunshine. But I'm also human. I'm also someone who has weather patterns, just like nature does. And I'm done pretending the sun is always shining when sometimes it's stormy.

Understanding My Weather Patterns

I've learned something important about myself: I need to know my weather.

You know how there's a tornado warning, and they tell you to take shelter? I've learned what I need when the sun isn't shining bright. And I've learned what I need to do when the sun IS shining.

When the sun is shining brighter, that's when my energy is up, when I need to be more creative, when I need to create content, build things, connect with people, dance in my living room, work on The Seny Collection.

When the sun is not shining at its brightest, that's when I need to do other things. Reflect. Rest. Go inward. Self-regulate. Come back to myself.

And I think God gave us these patterns for a reason - so we can self-regulate. You go inward, process, rest, and then come back out.

The key is knowing which weather you're in and honoring it, rather than forcing yourself to be sunny 365 days a year.

What I'm Building: A Community That Lives Freely

Now that I've decided to show up on social media consistently (not inconsistently, but CONSISTENTLY), I want to be very clear about what I'm building.

I'm building a community of people who just want to live freely.

Not a community of mothers who only talk about motherhood.

Not a community of entrepreneurs who only talk about business.

Not a community of fitness people who only post workout videos.

A community of whole human beings who give themselves permission to be everything they are:

- Mothers AND individuals

- Wives AND dreamers

- Business owners AND dancers

- Strong AND vulnerable

- Sunshine AND storms

- Perfectly imperfect

You don't have to pick a lane. You don't have to identify as just one thing.

Nobody's going to give you permission to just live except yourself. You have to decide.

So I'm deciding.

This Morning (A Snapshot of Real Life)

This morning I woke up after three hours of sleep. I had creatine. I had lemon water. I went to the gym. And I was still that ray of sunshine people talk about.

Because that's the thing - the sunshine isn't fake. It's real. It just isn't the ONLY thing that's real.

I can be exhausted and still show up. I can be struggling and still shine. I can be working through my own darkness and still bring light to others. These things can coexist.

That's me. That's Dolo. That's Dolo's Rhyme.

What Dolo's Rhyme Means

"Dolo's Rhyme" isn't just a clever name for my blog. It's my rhythm. My pattern. My way of moving through the world.

Life is a collection of verses - each one unique, filled with ups and downs, growth and beauty. My rhyme is the harmony I create among all my different roles, moods, and selves.

Some verses are upbeat. Some are melancholy. Some are powerful declarations. Some are quiet reflections. But they're all part of the same song.

And I fully own it. I accept it. I'm not apologizing for it.

The Declaration

So here's what I'm declaring:

I am a mother who also needs time away from her children to remember who she is.

I am an entrepreneur who also has days when I can't think about business at all.

I am a ball of sunshine, but I also have storms.

I am strong, and I am also still healing.

I am building The Seny Collection (celebrating African artisanship and empowering women) while also building myself.

I am moving my family to Senegal while still honoring everything America has given me.

I love to laugh, dance, be silly with my kids, talk, and connect, and I'm also someone who gets sad sometimes and needs to retreat.

I am someone who survived childhood trauma, mental health struggles, and feeling unworthy, and I'm also someone who has learned to shine like Seny (like gold) despite it all.

All of this is true. All of this is me. And I refuse to pick just one part to show the world.

An Invitation

If you're reading this and you're tired of picking a lane...

If you're exhausted from performing...

If you're done with the autopilot...

If you're ready to just LIVE freely and openly...

Welcome to Dolo's Rhyme.

This is a space where we don't apologize for our weather patterns. Where we honor both the sunshine and the storms. Where we give ourselves permission to be everything we are, not just the parts that are easy to categorize or market or understand.

We're mothers. We're dreamers. We're builders. We're survivors. We're works in progress. We're perfectly imperfect. We're here to live our lives on our own terms.

And we're done picking lanes.

This is me. This is Dolo. This is Dolo's Rhyme. And I fully own it.

What's your rhyme? What are you refusing to shrink? What lane are you refusing to pick?

Share your truth in the comments. Let's build this community of free-living, authentic humans together.

Follow the journey at www.dolosrhyme.com and @thesenycollection

About Dolo Rose Monemou: Mother of three, founder of The Seny Collection, woman who refuses to be one thing, and your reminder that you don't have to pick a lane to live a meaningful life. Currently moved her family to Senegal because why not add "international relocator" to the list of things she is.